Selfish vs Selfless ?

“Should one be selfish and their ‘good’ lies in it? But what if they hurt other people who are close? What should the priorities be? And what about the social and spiritual sense of things – – shouldn’t one be selfless and loving, giving?”

In an intuitive sense, most people seem to know what to do without having a moral dilemma- at least such a dilemma is not an everyday phenomenon for many. So this is for those tough moments, the ones before decision making and the hindsight ones we catch ourselves in at times:

(A quote by Rev Chariji referring to his Guru (Master), Revered Babuji Maharaj)

“My Master used to say that there are two duties every human being has – One has to, himself or herself, achieve self-development to the highest possible level, and the other is service to the society as His devotee. Obviously the second one can result in perfection only as the first one moves towards perfection.”

I hope this helps. Deep inside we may know, what is healthy and development oriented in any form, field in our life If not, learning how to tune in to see the difference between thought, impulse and the voice of heart helps weed out the inner conflicts and stress sources, to reach an integrated oneness.



I find ‘Healing’ in the emotional context especially, to be very tricky. Let me explain…

When we say healing, we are referring to a wound being healed or in the process of it.. We are talking about overcoming hurt and feelings of uncontainable sadness and pain over an event, or rather, the way the event has been interpreted and the meaning that we attach to it. Healing can be a very “feel good” thing by itself- and that is where I’m finding it a bit tricky.

There is something as a “good depression”, something healthy and necessary for our growth. It naturally becomes a part of the healing process- no matter how small or big the event in question is. The tricky thing I’ve been referring to, is when a healing act or assistance misreads this step or phase and tries to get away from this, thus creating a loop or a cyclic pattern bringing about an amount of dysfunction.

In simple words, healing can shade and fade into need for pampering!

So as far as we are aware of things within and taking into account the externals- be it people’s reactions and situations, it will help the healing process, no matter which method we employ, to stay on track and onwards to the goal.

So one danger is to get addicted to the healing process (in lines of feeling pampered). The second one is a conscious act to protect oneself. Let me explain: as a self-protection measure remembering the hurt or hurtful incidents in an “in the face” sort of way, so as to avoid falling in a vulnerable position again. In this case, the individual ends up hurting self each day in process by bringing that hurt again and again in the present moment and never really heal. How? The person is deliberately staying away from healing, leaving the ‘wounds’ open- out of fear, and without realizing, cradles the hurt or the hurtful memories.

So folks, the next time we use the word heal, let us take a look further, deeper.. and find out WITHIN the context at hand, what do we really mean, what are we really doing.. and what is actually happening!